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Organic Vegetable Delivery in Manila!

2011-07-05T09:24:00.000-04:00

Dear MPF Clients,

My Personal Farmer is proud to announce and share the wonderful news we received. We just received the water analysis report from the Philippine Pesticide Control stating that our water irrigation up and downstream have no trace of chemicals (report attached). "ND" on the results portion means there are no pesticide residues.

Organic farming isn't just about chemical-free pesticides and using chemical-free fertilizers. To achieve 100% Organic Farming is also about having access to a water source that is chemical-free. Having clean and safe water irrigation is VITAL as it has the power to fight disease and save lives. My Personal Farmer has safe water irrigation for its crops and sustenance of its livestock. With us you can guarantee that you and your family's health are in good hands.

Photo: My Personal Farmer's Reservoir, Manolo Fortich, Bukidnon

My Personal Farmer sticks true to its claim- we grow 100% ORGANIC and CHEMICAL-FREE vegetables. From our pesticides to our fertilizer and to our water source.

Share this good news with your friends and family. At My Personal Farmer your health is our priority.

Note: For more newsletters, you may visit: My Personal Farmer - Farmer's Notes - Letters from Renee

--
Donna N. Asistio

My Personal Farmer
Mobile: +63 (918) 914 3759
Office/Fax: + 632 894 2243
Website: www.mypersonalfarmer.net
Email: donna@mypersonalfarmer.net
"Heal the Land, its Farmers, and You"

The No Fear Approach to Manila

2011-06-28T02:39:00.000-04:00

If you are interested in reading more about Manila, I encourage you to visit Here and There, a blog written by friends of ours who aren't afraid of polluted air and little things like flood waters. Enjoy!

Bid List, Part II

2011-06-16T06:02:00.000-04:00

The summer bid list is out! Let the obsessing begin!

My bidding strategy has dramatically changed since A-100. The 2nd tour bidding process, although still a directed tour, is different, but my thoughts, feelings, and priorities have also changed.

When we were bidding in A-100, I was inclined to overlook negative comments about posts on Real Post Reports and the OBC's Post Info To Go. In an attempt at worldwide availability, I wanted to be open to a variety of posts, and would try to read between the lines of an author's negative comments to get to the "facts" about a post. In theory, this is a sound way to distinguish reality from negativity, but it did not adequately take into account that I too will be subject to emotional responses while living at that post. If there is an overwhelming amount of negativity coming from a post, there may be a darn good reason it.

We FS folks are all, whether we like it or not, subject to worldwide availability, and bidding can be stressful because most of us want to know what we are getting into. In reality, you never, ever, truly know what you are getting into until you are in it. This goes for any major life change or decision, and life in the Foreign Service is a life of constant adaptation.

Because we don't choose our assignments, especially as an entry level FS family, it is necessary to work hard to approach this life with flexibility and an attitude of learning. But is it also necessary to be realistic, to know one's own limits, and to be aware that the expectations we bring to post can affect our ability to successfully adapt.

I was surprised by my own experience of cultural adaptation. It is generally thought that culture shock begins to wear off at 6 months following one's arrival, but I took much longer. I arrived at post with an open, positive mind and a desire to see the "real" Manila, but at 7 months the city--and perhaps my failure to acknowledge that I was experiencing culture shock--began to wear on me. A short time later, I had the opportunity to experience a 3rd world illness first hand--an "inevitable" experience of life in the Foreign Service. As someone who has always taken health very seriously, I was NOT ok with the inevitability of this experience. However, it taught me that MED is competent and has good drugs.

Having survived a year of illness, frustration, and culture shock, as we bid on our next post I hope I have learned things about myself and life in the FS that will help me adapt at our next post. I have learned that if a post is rated a 25% hardship, there's a reason for that, and it will serve me well to go into the experience of living there with appropriate expectations rather than a desire to overlook reality by being positive. I have learned that culture shock is not a weakness, but an inevitable aspect of life on the move. And finally, I have learned to be honest with myself about my limitations. Negativity doesn't help, but neither does naivete.

To all of you bidding on this summer 2011 cycle, I wish you luck and a good night's sleep!

Are we still in the Philippines?

2011-06-14T03:07:00.000-04:00

Palawan still holds the title of my favorite place in the Philippines, but our recent trip to Baguio offered Palawan heavy competition.

In Northern Luzon, about 4-7 hours away from Manila (depending on traffic), a trip to the Ambassador's Residence in Baguio feels like a trip to another country. The air is clean and cool, and the air smells of ... pine trees!

Baguio was first developed around 1900 by Americans who were thrilled to have found mountains, pine trees, and cool air in the tropical climate of the Philippines. I can imagine their elation to have found a place that reminds us so much of home--even those of us from Florida! These pictures can't truly capture Baguio's sights, sounds, and most importantly, smells.

An early morning view from the patio.

The back of the Ambassador's Residence.

US Embassy personnel are welcome to stay at the Ambassador's Residence for a small fee. Children are not allowed in the main residence building, but there are two cabins on campus that are great for families. There are plenty of restaurants in the City of Baguio, but I recommend bringing your own food, taking long walks, and enjoying your respite in the mountains!

For more information about the Residence's history, please visit the US Embassy Website at http://manila.usembassy.gov/wwwhamb1.html.

FS Spouses and Partners: It's FLO Fellowship application time again!

2011-04-27T02:04:00.000-04:00

The State Department is pleased to announce the FLO Professional Development Fellowship program open to spouses and partners of direct-hire US Government employees under Chief of Mission Authority. This program is designed to assist those spouses and partners who are not in a position to pursue their career paths overseas to maintain, enhance, and/or develop their professional skills.

Proposals are due in M/DGHR/FLO no later than May 15, 2011.

Palawan Holiday

2011-04-27T01:36:00.000-04:00

Our recent trip to Palawan, an outlying island province in the Philipinnes, may havebeen my favorite domestic trip thus far. Palawan is well known for its diving and world class El Nido Resorts in the north, but central Palawan has a lot to offer as well.

Palawan is the long, skinny island far to the left nearly touching Malaysia

We flew into Puerto Princesa and took a two hour van ride through the mountains to get to our resort near the Underground River, a UNESCO World Heritage Site and a must see for any trip to Central Palawan.

Sabang's unspoiled beaches surrounded by mountains are reminiscent of Hawaii, but since the Philippines has not made it onto Western tourists' radar, these beaches are undeveloped and unspoiled.

Sabang Beach

You can take a day tour from Puerto Princessa to the Underground River, but I recommend staying in Sabang. The mountainous, somewhat maintained road from the city to the Underground River area is an exhausting drive. Your hotel can book your tour and make sure you have the necessary permits--do not drive yourself to Sabang without these permits, as you will have to return to Puerto Princessa to get a permit before being allowed to participate in any of the activities.

The Underground River is incredible, although the boats they send you out in are small and ride awfully low. Once you get over worrying about falling in the water you can appreciate the wonders of the cave. The bats will not hurt you, but they fly low, so be prepared.

Emerging from the cave

The Underground River Park also has monitor lizards and monkeys. You can hike from Sabang to the Park on the Monkey Trail--technically this requires another permit.

Monitor Lizards (Bayawak)

From Sabang Beach you can hike along the coast on the rocks. The contrast of the colors of the rocks and the clear tropical water is beautiful, but the terrain is slippery and sharp.

For a lazy day, our resort offers Carabao cart rides. We didn't take a ride, but we did enjoy watching the baby carabao who wanders the grounds. He stays close to his tethered mama.

Wonderful snorkeling sites are approximately a 45 minute boat ride from Sabang Beach, and have different coral from the reefs close to Manila.

I recommend Daluyon Resort for its location and great food/food service, but not for its lack of hot water. The resort boasts of having solar water heaters and dismisses all hot water failures as a unavoidable part of being eco-friendly, but in doing so they are doing the environment a disservice. We installed a solar water heater in our house in Florida, and enjoyed hot showers every day.

Holy Week in the Philipinnes

2011-04-20T20:33:00.000-04:00

In the US the year-end holiday season incorporates a variety of religious holidays and also celebrates the changing of the year. The Holidays are celebrated by Americans of all faiths for the season's abundance of parties, gifts, food, and a few days off from work. Despite being a predominantly Catholic country, the same is true for the Philippines. In fact, I felt that the culture of Christmas gift giving was even more pressured here than in the US.

This week is Holy Week, and my first experience of a nationwide religious celebration. Last Sunday the streets were filled with vendors selling palm fronds, and Maundy Thursday and Good Friday are non-working holidays honored by nearly all businesses. In contrast, many working Filipinos do not have Christmas Day off. My driver is celebrating his four day weekend by taking a family trip to his home province, and it is very rare that his adult daughter and son, who work in a call center and a mall, respectively, get time off from work.

Holy Week in the Philippines is known for its Good Friday processionals that feature penitents engaging in self-flagellation and, in Pampanga, crucifixion. Locals and Wikipedia tell me that such practices are strongly discouraged by the Church, but those who practice self-flagellation view it as a form of devout worship. My driver tells me that the person selected to be crucified in Pampanga campaigns to be chosen, and is usually someone who believes that he has sinned and needs to be reborn in his devotion to Jesus. The crucifixion lasts for about an hour, and is hopefully carried out by someone with darn good aim. The Philippine Department of Health encourages tetanus shots.

A 2006 devotional crucifixion in Pampanga

From http://www.clarkphilippines.com/?p=5516.

In Manila, the city shuts down on Thursday and Friday, the radio stations suspend regular programming, and many people leave town. I've heard that there will be several processionals here in town. The processionals are bloody affairs, as you can see for yourself if you Google images of Holy Week in the Philippines.

I don't anticipate being anywhere near a crucifixion, but I am finding this experience interesting. Like many other cultural experiences in the Philippines, Holy Week feels familiar, and yet so different from my experiences in the US.

Culture Shock 101 (Duh)

2011-04-13T05:08:00.000-04:00

As a new Foreign Service spouse I expected to be mostly adjusted to post six-seven months into my tour. As a clinical social worker, I should have known better. There is no chart; no timeline that you can fit yourself into perfectly. Knowing generally what to expect in a foreign country and educating oneself about adapting to change can help, but it won't necessarily make the process easier.

Before arriving at post I bought the book Culture Shock! and attended Tagalog classes at FSI, and from these resources felt somewhat prepared for what I would find in the Philippines. In my first few months I remember referencing what I had learned, but around December apparently forgot everything. It is only very recently that I have been able to shake off my bewildered frustration enough to be able to see what is happening to me--so this is culture shock! (Duh.)

Newcomers to the US Embassy are told that English-speaking Westerners get themselves in trouble because because Philippine social interaction is familiar on a superficial level. Even armed with this warning, it's easy to assume that you are able to communicate when you are both speaking English. ASSume nothing.

Even those of us with the best intentions can be overwhelmed by the emotional burden of living in a culture that is deeply different from one's own, and one of the reasons I joined the Foreign Service was for the learning experiences. Seven months later, I'm hitting the books--again, and because I have a point of reference, am learning much more from my reading. Expat survival guides such as Culture Shock! can be helpful in normalizing one's expat experience, but cannot help one avoid culture shock.

My personal guidelines for the rest of my tour in Manila:

1) Be indirectly clear, and clearly indirect. Do not expect to "talk it out."
2) There is no queue.
3) There is no privacy.
4) "Yes" = maybe, sometimes, I don't know, I don't care, I have no idea what you just said, and sometimes ... yes!
5) My expectations are appropriate for life on the other side of the planet. (Duh.) Let the little things go.

Hardship = Hard on Your Patience

2011-03-28T07:33:00.000-04:00

I have never been so patient--or rather, impatient--for so long, and for so many things. My seven months at post could also be called the great patience whirlpool of 2010-11, still ongoing.

Manila is not unique in its ability to drive a mild-mannered American to insanity. Extraordinary amounts of patience are required at most countries with a State department hardship rating, and in general, Americans are not known for their patience.

Manila's unique demands on my patience usually turn up at the checkout counter. I used to love grocery shopping, and now avoid it because checking out is such an ordeal. Despite being exempt as part of my diplomatic status, I sometimes pay the 12% sales tax because my mental health is more important to me than the money. Even when I'm not using the VAT-exempt card, checking out is cumbersome, and usually involves signing multiple pieces of paper while several salesclerks crowd around you. I used to love browsing the aisles; now I love Amazon.com.

This particular aspect of hardship may have a greater impact on the family member who manages the household. Grocery shopping, paying bills, running errands, and generally providing for the household's daily needs all require multiple weekly trips through a checkout line, not to mention navigating the crowds and roller derby-esqueness of Manila's traffic.

Some things to note: the barreling buses, the jeepneys stopping in the middle of the road, the disembarking jeepney riders strolling across five lanes of traffic, and the general din of the car horns. It is remarkable that there are few serious car accidents, and it is because every Manila driver is paying 110% attention to the road.

How to deal? Beats me. But I can imagine that the more humor you interject into your experience, the easier it is to not take it seriously. For example, "I've been standing here for 20 minutes trying to make you let me pay you and we still aren't done? Isn't that hilarious." "That guy just ran into my side mirror. Now that's entertainment."

If unavoidable daily frustrations can become lovable, or at least entertaining, quirks of the city, the less those frustrations will seep into every interaction you have. This is especially important when the daily stress of being constantly frustrated begins to impact your relationships with co-workers, friends and family members.

Most of this frustration is due to the system being different. If Manila natives were made as crazy as I am by their daily activities, we'd have a city full of adults throwing tantrums fit for a toddler. This is what makes a hardship post hard: the degree to how different it is from life in the US. When I'm having a good day--aka my reservoir of patience is especially full that day--I can see past my frustrations to the beauty of living in Manila. Perhaps by the end of our two year tour I too will consider 30 minutes at the checkout counter a fact of life, and can better appreciate that the clerk who is making me wait wears a genuine smile the entire time.

To read about a FS spouse who doing a fantastic job of making the most of her hardship post, visit A Moveable Kitchen.

City of Contrast

2011-03-10T04:29:00.000-05:00

For seven months I've been meaning to write a post about Manila being a city of contrasts, but I never knew quite how to say it. So I won't. I'll just share these videos with you.

The first video is of a typical "real" Manila neighborhood. This one happens to be close to my housing community, although my apartment is inside a wall with barbed wire and a serious guard gate.

This video is from a neighborhood called Rockwell, where wealthy people live, and where I can go grocery shopping without wanting to tear my hair out--most of the time.

In Manila, depending on where you live, your daily travels will take you in and out of neighborhoods just like these, and you get to see the extremes of the socioeconomic structure here. After seven months I am still struck by the differences.

FS Perks and the Hospicio de San Jose

2011-02-27T02:22:00.000-05:00

One of the advantages of having a part-time job is being able to get involved in ways you don't have the energy for when you work 40+ hours/week. One of the advantages of living overseas as part of the US Embassy community is that it is relatively easy to get involved through organizations such as Manila's USEC.

In February I organized a diaper drive for my favorite local charity, the Hospicio de San Jose [HSJ]. I fell in love with HSJ in December when I attended the Marines' Toys for Tots presentation as USEC's representative, and every time I go back I am struck by the institution's positive energy.

Toys for Tots in December 2010

HSJ cares for orphans, special needs children/adults, and the elderly. Many special needs children are not adopted, and they live out their lives at HSJ.

Ambassador Thomas greets HSJ residents.

Many years ago, HSJ had a "turning cradle" stationed at its entrance, where women could surrender their babies anonymously. The mother would place her baby inside the "cradle," ring a bell, and turn it around, signifying that she had given her baby up for adoption.

The turning cradle is now housed in HSJ's museum.

The US Embassy community donated nearly 7000 adult and children's diapers to HSJ, and we had the honor of presenting them to Sister Corrie and the HSJ staff today.

Ambassador Thomas with the HSJ Sisters

We were greeted with song and dance at every turn!

This little boy can really get his groove on!

Our last entertainment was a performance of the Macarena

I consider opportunities such as these a perk of life in the Foreign Service. For more information on becoming a USEC volunteer, please visit its Facebook page. For more infomation on the Hospicio de San Jose, please click here to visit a Web page maintained by one of HSJ's alumni.

Swimming with the whale sharks

2011-02-22T02:43:00.002-05:00

Heading to Donsol to swim with the whale sharks (butanding) made Lonely Planet's top ten in Asia, so of course it was one of our domestic travel priorities.

Although the whale sharks are the main tourist attraction, there's much more to do in the region, and I recommend taking an island-hopping boat tour one day and a firefly tour in the evening. Philippine fireflies are much smaller than those found in the US, and the sight was not quite as incredible as when the fireflies decorated the park last sumer in Falls Church, VA, but it's worth taking the tour.

We stayed at Giddy's, a Filipino-style hotel I recommend despite having to chase the kitchen staff down in order to be fed--every single time. The cooks were on island time. Other than the restaurant, the hotel staff was very good about organizing tours and being on time--a rare experience in this country, especially in the provinces. Another rare experience: the hotel was set in the middle of the town, so we were able to witness and even participate in local life without the barriers of guards, gates, and metal detectors. The night before we left for Donsol I returned from two nights/three days in Singapore, and, having had some time in Singapore to recover from Manila, I fully enjoyed this unique experience. Had I not been coming from the cleanest, most efficient city in the universe, I may not have been able to appreciate Donsol quite as much.

When you land at the Legaspi airport and step outside the plane, you can't miss the Mayon Volcano--a very active volcano.

The hour long trip to Donsol takes you through villages and lush greenery, and depending on your vehicle, is a pleasant trip. If one day of swimming with the whale sharks is enough for you, take an all day banca trip for snorkeling and waterfall swimming.

And finally, the whale sharks. My husband's description of the experience:

This is exactly how it happens -- the guide jumps in from a moving boat, you follow, knowing not where the beast lurks. You frantically search around in the dim water, looking for the city-bus sized creature. When the guide stops swimming, you know it's close. Then BAM ... there it is and you better move out of the way.

Even though the whale sharks are plankton-eating gentle giants, one dive was enough adventure for me.

First Quarter Down

2011-02-08T23:40:00.001-05:00

In honor of our 6 month anniversary of arriving in Manila (January 31), our one year anniversary of arriving in DC to join the FS (February 14), and the winter bidding cycle, here's my six-month perspective on Manila as a FS post:
Strengths:
1) Community - The Embassy has wonderful leadership and is staffed by a great group of people, creating a friendly work environment despite the heavy workload in the consular section. The social community is inclusive and supportive, and there are plenty of opportunities to make friends.
2) Travel - The Philippines is a beautiful country, and Manila is well located for Southeast Asian travel. Domestic travel can be either cheap or expensive, depending on where you stay.
3) Food - Although Filipino food and Americans don't usually mix well, there are good restaurants in Makati and the Fort.
4) Domestic help - Imagine a life where your house is always clean, dinner is ready, and there's no such thing as laundry nights. And most importantly, you can afford it. Drivers are helpful in dealing with the traffic and parking problems, and can multi-task as professional dog walkers, errand runners, and bag schleppers.
5) Safety - There are certain places in the country where you cannot go, and there is a travel warning in the Philippines, but Manila is generally as safe as any other mega-city.
6) Availability of goods - Unless you shop like a local, and it's difficult to shop like a local, you will pay US equivalent or higher prices for most of your groceries and household basics. Manila has a 5% COLA. However, you have access to many familiar US, Australian, and European goods, which helps if you are already overwhelmed by the city. When you can't think straight because you battled an hour of traffic getting to the grocery store, at last you will find a few familiar labels on the shelves. You won't find everything you want, but you'll find most of it. Local and imported fruits and veggies are generally plentiful, depending on the season.
7) Good deals - Restaurant dining and home food delivery is extremely affordable, particularly if you are used to paying D.C. prices. High-quality and skilled crafts, furniture, jewelry and clothing is wonderfully inexpensive at markets such as Greenhills, and travel can be cheap. You can have incredibly fresh, organic vegetables delivered nearly to your door for less than $100/month--take that, Whole Foods. Massages are the best deal in town, even at the Sofitel.
8) EFM employment - Most spouses who want to work are able to find a job at the Embassy, and most enjoy their work.

Challenges:
1) Air quality: The air quality here is poor, which makes it difficult to spend very much time outside. In addition to the pollution caused by smoke-spewing buses, cars, and jeepneys, there's always an interesting smell heading your way on the next breeze.
2) Traffic: Planning a night out is always a challenge. It could take 15 minutes to get to your destination, or it could take over an hour, and the traffic is unpredictable. For this reason, most people spend a lot of time at home or at the homes of their friends. In addition, driving in Manila is difficult, and requires your full attention when you are behind the wheel. The rule of the road is that there are no rules.
3) Nothing is easy: The only easy way to run an errand in Manila is to ask your driver to run it for you. From the traffic to finding what you need to dealing with salespeople, hilarity inevitably ensues.
4) Noise: Fireworks go off year round and at all times of the day and night, cars backfire, horns blare, scooters buzz, and there is the occasional parade.
5) Walk-ability: What walk-ability?
6) Money: Yes, you can save money, but not as much as you'd think. Good mental health requires escaping from the city approximately once/month, which can get expensive.

Resistance is Futile

2011-01-19T03:46:00.001-05:00

A few weeks ago we rented Outsourced, a movie about an American call center manager who travels to India to train his replacement. I recommend this movie to all American expats, and especially to those who have lived or traveled extensively in a developing country. In one scene, the main character, desperate for a cheeseburger, drives to Delhi in pursuit of a McDonald's, only to find that they do not carry beef. Frustrated and generally discontented, he meets another American expat, who, after recommending the veggie burger, counsels the man to stop resisting India.

In Outsourced, this single conversation is a turning point for the main character, who immediately starts embracing life in India. For the rest of us, embracing a culture that is so dramatically different from our own may take a bit more than a single conversation.

The first few months in a new country are difficult, but at first it's easy to be positive. You may find certain aspects of the new culture grating, but in the first months they haven't annoyed you long enough for the irritation to seep into your bones. Once you move past four/five months, the cumulative effect of hundreds of small irritations begins to settle over your mind like a net, and you find yourself trapped in a constant state of resistance.

There are many things about life in Manila an American may resist. You could spend your entire tour should-ing all over everything. There are some aspects I will never love: the environmental catastrophe that is metro Manila, the traffic, and the general lack of structure in most aspects of daily life--with the exception of checking out, which requires one to sign fifteen pieces of paper and visit ten different counters to have one's receipt scribbled upon.

Yet there are many aspects of Manila life that I enjoy, and they are not all related to enjoying the company of my fellow Foreign Service community members. The elastic state of "rules" and "policies" often works in one's favor: take five minutes to stand your ground and you may end up with a discount instead of being ripped off. It doesn't get much better than an hour long massage from a skilled therapist in a clean facility for $10 USD. And it's easy to live in harmony with people who are good-natured, happy, and totally unwilling to engage in conflict.

I may never embrace the smell of car exhaust greeting me when I step outside my door in the morning, but hopefully, in my second six months in Manila, I can learn to embrace the flow of daily life. I have tried resistance, and discovered that it is indeed futile.

Some things in Manila just make sense.

Holy Moly Holidays

2011-01-06T01:31:00.001-05:00

Americans who are living in the Philippines sometimes make the mistake of thinking that because the country--or at least Manila--imitates American commercialism, the two cultures are similar. But beyond a similar fondness for Starbucks, I have experienced the two cultures as being vastly different.

Every first tour family may find their first holiday season away from home difficult, which is partially why we spent December 25th in Singapore. However, beyond the emotional aspects of missing family and friends, I found the holiday season in Manila to be more stressful than in the US.

Philippine culture is family and group oriented, and in general, Filipinos are very generous. If you have something, you must share it, even if doing so is a hardship. You may be poor, but there's someone in your extended family who is poorer, and you are expected to contribute some of your income to that person. Especially at Christmas time.

The expectation to GIVE can feel, to an American, overwhelming, but based on the traffic, aggression, and general tension in the city starting November 1st and only breaking on January 1st, it must be stressful for Filipinos as well.

The culture also has high expectations regarding spending. For example, the required contribution for a nearby domestic helper/driver holiday gathering was a day's salary--give or take a little depending on one's earning power. What would you do if you learned your required contribution to your office party was a day's pay?

Filipinos embrace life with a positive, live in the moment, bahala na (Leave it to God) attitude that make such cultural traditions enjoyable. It is this same attitude that Filipinos draw upon when they are smiling through extreme hardship.

Meanwhile, I am already working on spending November and December 2011 on an isolated beach.

New Year's Eve, however, is fantastic. Find someplace high to watch the panoramic view of the surprisingly large fireworks coming from everywhere you look. Viewed from a safe distance, the show is wonderful, even when someone is shooting fireworks horizontally off their high rise balcony, and someone else is launching them towards this same balcony, so that the fireworks appear to be hitting the side of the building. Unfortunately, this fantastic show is not without consequences, and the latest count of New Year's injuries is up to 929. Because after all, if you don't have any fireworks, shoot your gun instead. It's all about the noise.

The following image is from 2010, but it gives you an idea.

This travel blog photo's source is TravelPod page: Happy New Year!

Christmas with the Monkeys

2010-12-30T00:00:00.000-05:00

To escape some of the Holiday craziness in Manila and find some clean air, we spent the four day Christmas weekend in Singapore. I never thought about traveling to Singapore before we lived in Manila, but it's an interesting city. For us, its main attractions were its parks.

There are pros and cons to being in a country with very strict rules, but one of the pros is Singapore's commitment to conservation. We benefited from three of those projects, and four if you count the zoo: Fort Cannery Park, the Botanical Gardens, and the Nature Reserve.

Botanical Gardens

The Botanical Gardens are free to the public, responsible dog-owner friendly, and very close to the Embassy. You could easily spend your lunch hour de-stressing in the green.

The Singapore Zoo is a delight for adults and children. So many monkeys!!

Singapore Zoo

There is a family of orangutans who roam free in the treetops above the sidewalks. But watch out if one of them is above your head!

For an additional fee you can stay for the 7 pm Night Safari, which is in an entirely separate park next to the zoo. Even though tours leave every ten minutes, I recommend getting in line at 6 pm. You'll wait about an hour, but if you arrive at 6:30p you'll be in line for much, much longer.

Bukit Timah Nature Reserve, also free to the public, is a mostly undisturbed section of primary rain forest, and heaven to green lovers from Manila! Surprisingly polite wild monkeys roam about, and if you look closely you will see a flying lemur, or a Colugo, trying to blend in with a tree's bark. If you are especially lucky you might see one take flight.

Bukit Timah Nature Reserve

Singapore is Manila's polar opposite: it's quiet, exceptionally clean, and orderly. If you're looking for 3rd world adventure it's not for you, but it is a welcome break to Americans living in Manila. However, you'd best follow the rules.

In Manila most rules are a suggestion and open to various ways of "coping" with getting caught, but Singaporeans take their rules very seriously.

Bawal Umihi Dito

2010-11-20T05:49:00.000-05:00

"Bawal umihi dito" is signage familiar to any resident of the Philippines. Variations include "Bawal umihi D2" and "Bawal umihi," but they all communicate the same: don't pee on me.

As you drive through Manila you will see this request scrawled on the sides of buildings, in corners, and pretty much anywhere there is an opening between the storefronts and carts that line the streets. If you are a male in the Philippines, the world really is your urinal. Unless, of course, you obey the signs.

At first a Western foreigner (with a basic understanding of Tagalog) might find these signs off putting. One might ask,"Do people just urinate everywhere?" The answer is, probably not, for two reasons: 1) there are designated male urinals provided by the MMDA and 2) considering the city's poverty, Manila is clean. For example, the man in the picture below may not be peeing inside the urinal, but at least he's peeing next to it.

From GMAnews.TV

You may be thinking, "How sexist. Where do women ihi?" Don't worry, earlier this year the MMDA announced that it will soon be placing female urinals in Manila. Since the male urinals are pink, the female urinals will be painted green.

Bawal umihi dito signs bring joy to my early morning and late evening commutes to and from yoga teacher training. I understand it as a metaphor for life, and seriously, how many times have you wanted to say, "Dude, please don't pee here!"

I am not the first person to find these signs significant. If you Google "Bawal umihi dito," you will find links where you can buy T-shirts and baseball caps sporting the phrase. You too can ask the world to take its urine elsewhere.

http://shop.cafepress.com/bawalumihidito

Shangri-La

2010-11-02T05:15:00.000-04:00

After three months of living and traveling in the Philippines, this past weekend I found myself overwhelmed once again. Our Cebu hotel room had blankets, clean tap water, and reliable hot water, and even more disorienting, it did not have an odor wafting from the drains nor the little hand bucket found in nearly every Philippine bathroom. I didn't even find a chameleon in my drink glass in the morning.

When we first arrived I was surprised at how little I was impressed by the resort's comparative luxury. I got over it, but my initial reaction helped me see how much my perspective has changed in my time here. In our previous island travels we had been staying in places that, although nice, were rustic, and yet these places make you feel like you really are on a tropical island. Our Cebu hotel, although very nice, reminded me of a Disney resort.

Lonely Planet describes the Mactan island resorts as places that appeal to "fly-in, fly-out tourists from within Asia who pay top dollar to be insulated against the Philippines," and if that's what you're looking for then this is a darn good place to do it. Other than the natural beauty of the water and the coral reefs, the closest a tourist will get to experiencing the Philippines at this resort is the Filipino counter at the breakfast buffet. The hotel makes an effort to remind its guests that they are, in fact, visiting the Philippines by stocking its mini-bars with Pinoy ramen noodles. Available for purchase for P120.

Yet guests seeking insulation still can't avoid the road from the airport. On our night time trip to the resort we stopped at a crossroads in front of a sari-sari store, where two men stood with large, pink pigs on leashes. This was the first time I've seen a large pig on a leash, and while I looked on, one of the pigs began to urinate, creating a flowing river of pig pee in front of the resort's shuttle bus.

This amused me, but blankets in a hotel room? Now that's shocking.

"a permanently happy land, isolated from the outside world"

FLOwing Home

2010-10-27T09:43:00.002-04:00

The first few months in a new post are both wonderful and difficult. Each country is unique and presents its own set of challenges, and most people go through a period--usually within the first six months--where everything sucks.

I believe this attitude--which I am familiar with--comes from the cumulative stress of daily life being harder than it was before, and hardship posts may be more disruptive than others. Hardship posts earn their designations for a variety of factors, but they are all cities "where conditions of environment differ substantially from conditions of environment in the United States." Life in a non-hardship isn't necessarily better, but it's probably easier--at least at first.

Manila is a hardship post with a relatively high differential rating (meaning it's harder than most places), but not for the same reasons as Mauritania, Africa or Kabul. Once I battle the traffic and the smog and arrive at the grocery store I can find most of the things I need (although not necessarily in the same place two weeks in a row) as long as I'm willing to pay for them. But Manila is certainly a place where the environmental conditions are different than the US, which has given me the opportunity to reflect on trade-offs in the Foreign Service.

Throughout our lives we prioritize and make choices, but when basic aspects of life such as housing are inconstant, we are more frequently confronted with the compromises involved in our choices. The Foreign Service requires you to make a lot of choices on faith. You don't really know what a post will be like until after you've lived there a few months. Some times things work out just like you imagined, and sometimes they don't.

When we headed to DC for A-100, I left my career as I knew it behind. A thriving therapy practice and foreign service spousehood don't mix well. I knew that was choosing a professional life change, but I had no idea what that change would look like.

We extensively researched ways for me to have a career--career being a loosely defined term that included everything from jam making to getting another graduate degree, but until recently I had no idea what would happen to my professional identity.

Fortunately I had something to ground me: I knew what I didn't want to do.

There are many things that you give up when you choose a life in the Foreign Service, but this life has benefits far beyond hardship pay differentials and weekend trips to tropical paradises (although I must say the weekend trips are pretty awesome). Thanks to my supervisor's support with unpaid leave and FLO's professional development fellowship program, I am beginning a month-long, intensive, 200 hour vinyasa flow yoga teacher training next week.

For several years being a yoga teacher has been my dream, but it was never feasible because the training requires a significant commitment of time and money, and I already had a full-time job. But now I have the opportunity to pursue a career that would have been difficult if not impossible before we joined the Foreign Service. Thank you, FLO, Manila CLO, and my husband, whose desire to be a Foreign Service Officer helped me find a new professional home!

Julie the Yogini

Where's the palm oil?

2010-10-14T20:56:00.000-04:00

Our trip to Hong Kong reminded me why Manila is a fantastic post. Incredible cities like Hong Kong are a two hour plane trip away. We went to visit an A-100 friend and enjoyed a weekend in the first world. Our first night there our friend took us to what the locals consider a "seedy" area of town, but all I could see was evidence of working infrastructure and money. It's amazing how one's definition of "nice" changes. Manila has plenty of upscale malls and areas of abject poverty, but there's not much in between. And you certainly can't find Guinness on tap.

The view from the Star Ferry

If you look real hard you might see Batman jumping off the building.

Maybe some day we'll have such a view.

I love that they use bamboo

A misty trip to the peak

My other house is my castle

2010-10-12T10:21:00.000-04:00

There are many things I love about the Foreign Service, but losing my feeling of autonomy is not one of them. When I wrote Freedom of No Choice, I described feeling grateful that I didn't have to decide which post was the best fit for our family. Now that we are living at post, I find that I am much less comfortable with my lack of choice in my environment.

Our post assignment is not the source of my discomfort. The city of Manila deserves its designation as a hardship post, but the beauty of the Philippines and Manila's proximity to Southeast Asia makes it a very enjoyable post. However, I never expected to be so uncomfortable in our assigned housing, nor did I anticipate having so much trouble with our shipments. Of course, I never imagined that our bedroom would be larger than the dining room and living room combined, and I didn't know how attached I was to my stuff until it arrived broken, or not at all.

It is because we are living in a foreign city--and a hardship city--that losing our autonomy over these aspects of our lives is especially stressful. When you are overwhelmed by the world outside, your home is your sanctuary. But if you don't feel comfortable in your home, you have no sanctuary.

The topic of housing is so saturated with negative emotion that it's the proverbial third rail in the Foreign Service community. There are some who will never be satisfied with their housing, but there is also a great deal of room for improvement in the housing assignment policies. Yet even with policy improvements it would still be painful to not be able to act on one's own behalf, especially when it is about something so fundamental as being comfortable in your own house. Unless, of course, your housing assignment meets all of your needs and exceeds your wildest expectations.

Julie was very glad when her house arrived

Crash Bang Scoot Drift

2010-10-01T21:58:00.003-04:00

"Crash and Bang " is a course at the Foreign Service Institute [FSI] that prepares overseas staff and their families for driving in conditions where it might be prudent to wear protective gear inside your vehicle. If FSI had a course for driving in Manila they would call it "Scoot and Drift."

Manila's reputation for horrendous traffic is well earned. The money that we were saving by being a one car family will soon be spent on hiring a driver. However, we are not hiring a driver because the traffic is dangerous.

Manila is so congested there isn't room for reckless driving. Its drivers could be compared to small town USA drivers, but packed like sardines and with crazy buses, jeepneys, and scooters thrown in for fun.

When driving in Manila it is important to keep your eyes forward. You are responsible for the front of your car and the back end of the car in front of you, and if you spend too much time looking in your rear view mirror you will cause an accident. And regardless of the official laws, it will be your fault because you weren't obeying the "rules."

If you are unable to tolerate drifters, do not try to drive in Manila. According to the "rules," the best way to get across four lanes of traffic is to just go. Go slowly, but without hesitation--the people whose bumpers are behind yours are expected to let you through.

If you need to get into a lane, just go. I call this "scooting" because you can't go fast enough to dart. You scoot into a space, and then you sit. When scooting, never, ever, ever play chicken with a bus or a scooter. The buses know they are the biggest vehicles on the road, and the scooter drivers are just plain loco.

Considering the size of the city, there is a relatively low incidence of traffic fatalities in Manila, and most of those accidents involve scooters. Because they are NUTS. I haven't tried driving outside of Pasay and Malate so I can't speak for the driving conditions in Makati and beyond, but from what we've observed, it's not impossible to drive oneself, but doing so would require excessive amounts of Gatorade and chocolate.

Overall, unless you have an incredible amount of patience, hiring a driver will probably improve your quality of life, especially if you live in Makati or the Fort, or are driving outside the city during the work week. In the meantime, I will continue to pat myself on the back for deciding to keep our large vehicle and sell our smaller car. Size does matter.

The commuter buses in Manila are the size of large tour buses.

Jeepneys are about the size of a standard SUV.

Worldwide Wienerdog

2010-09-19T04:58:00.000-04:00

Hello, this is Grace, one of Mobile Home's superstars. I have short legs, but in my (almost) four years, I've really gotten around.

I was born in Tennessee and first joined a pack that wasn't the best fit for me. Apparently my first pack leader found me a little difficult to live with ... who knows why. Then, when I was nine months old, I moved to Florida and joined a different pack. My new pack had another red dachshund, and she was awesome. She let me sleep in her bed and taught me to eat my food fast. After a while she went away, and although I missed her, for a few months I got all the attention from my pack leaders. Life was good.

Then the interloper ... I mean, Julie ... arrived. She has really long legs and no respect for my stature, but I guess she's ok. She climbs in my chair with me, and when I'm cold I let her stay. I especially like it when she lays down so I can make sure she knows I'm in charge.

In the last eight months my pack has moved from Florida to Virgina to Manila. I think some of my friends were worried about my trip overseas, but it was ok. I didn't have a great time at the kennel in Virginia because a mean dog bit my ear, but my stay in Amsterdam was ok, and I was happy when Julie and I were reunited with our pack leaders in Manila. When we were waiting in the Manila airport's cargo arrival area I could hear my pack leaders' voices behind the big wall, so I barked a lot to make sure they knew I was there.

I like my new house in Manila. We have a great aso ya-ya who takes good care of us when our pack leaders are away. I used to give her the stink eye, but now I like her a lot.

The best part about living here is the opportunity to chase stray cats. I stand watch at my window to make sure no cats try to sneak in.

When we go outside I patrol the stairs, the park, and everywhere else in our neighborhood. A couple of times I managed to tackle a lounging cat, but my pack leader pulled me back. I have no idea why--I totally could have taken it.

Julie doesn't understand that the cats are invaders who must be eliminated. Sometimes our pack leaders let her off the leash and she just walks by cats that are invading our territory! But she does sit at the window and make sure the tree trimmers stay in line.

If anyone wants to know more about my experience as a Foreign Service dog, feel free to ask. In the meantime, if you see any cats trying to sneak past my perimeter, let me know.

I want to eat your brains ...

2010-09-17T04:22:00.002-04:00

Today I had a cultural experience.

I subscribe to an organic produce delivery service called My Personal Farmer. For 3200 pesos/month we receive a box of fresh, organic fruits and vegetables once a week, delivered directly to our neighborhood. The produce is grown in Mindanao, harvested the morning of the delivery, and flown up to Manila the same day. I am enjoying this service for three reasons 1) I've never tasted such delicious vegetables 2) The (almost) doorstep delivery is fantastic and 3) I have the opportunity to experience new fruits and vegetables.

For example, this is a marang:

I think I just had a zombie experience.

When it arrived our helper told me how to open it once it had ripened. She was very excited when we received it and said that we would be able to smell when it ripened. She did not, however, warm us that I would wander around the house for a half hour looking for the horrible smell before finally tracking it down. You could smell it outside our front door!

However, the fruit inside is actually pretty good. Smells can be deceiving.

More Beautiful Places (and a bit of humanity)

2010-09-14T04:36:00.002-04:00

In the six weeks we've been living here we've taken every opportunity to explore. Life in Manila can be difficult, but outside the city--and even some places inside it--it's beautiful.

A few weeks ago we joined a CLO trip to Coco Beach in Puerto Galera, Mindorno.

The water was gorgeous, and the air clean.

After the sunset we enjoyed the stars--the clearest sky I've seen in a long time.

Last weekend we explored the La Mesa Ecopark in Quezon City, which is in metro Manila. The Ecopark is a breath of fresh air in the city, although with traffic it may take as long to get to the Ecopark as it does to get to Tagaytay.

We passed block after block of typical Manila sights

And miraculously found ourselves in a beautiful park.

It was wonderful to see what Manila must have looked like before being developed. Manila has many of these gems, but it takes effort to battle the traffic and get to them. Outside the city the country is gorgeous, although evidence of poverty is everywhere.

And on the way home, comic relief:

The Breath of Life

2010-09-14T03:45:00.000-04:00

You'd think that writing would be easier after our move overseas, but I've found it to be more difficult. Our first month in the Philippines has offered plenty of potential writing topics, but the idea of organizing any of them in to an essay is exhausting.

There's so much information to process in the first weeks at a new post it's difficult to think, much less write. I didn't recognize that I was feeling overwhelmed until I tried to organize my thoughts into a blog. Being a former hospice social worker, I find myself comparing the new post adjustment process to Therese Rando's six Rs of grief:

Recognize the loss/change: People must experience the loss/change and understand that it has happened.

"I'm where?! Who are you people? And what is that smell?"

React: People react emotionally to their loss/change.

"!@#$$%% palm oil!"

Recollect and Re-Experience: People may review memories of their lost relationship (events that occurred, places visited together, or day to day moments that were experienced together).

"Remember when I could breathe inside a supermarket? Those were good times."

Relinquish: People begin to put their loss behind them, realizing and accepting that the world has truly changed and that there is no turning back.

"I accept that the smell of frying palm oil is a part of my new world, and am grateful for the places where that smell is absent."

Readjust: People begin the process of returning to daily life and the loss/change starts to feel less acute and sharp.

"Oh look, I can buy Wesson canola oil in the grocery store!"

Reinvest: Ultimately, people re-enter the world, forming new relationships and commitments. They accept the changes that have occurred and move past them.

"I am fortunate that the use of palm oil in the Philippines has significantly reduced my french fry consumption."

In addition to my palm oil adjustment, there are many other aspects of change that require their own set of Rs. No wonder we call it culture shock. We are enjoying our life here and working hard on adapting our expectations. You don't realize what you take for granted until you are confronted with it's absence. Such as fresh, clean, palm-oil-free air.

Pictures and Words

2010-09-06T08:08:00.000-04:00

Check out Nomadagraphs!

Beyond Barbed Wire

2010-09-02T02:39:00.000-04:00

Living and working abroad as a private citizen can be difficult, but living and working abroad as a Foreign Service family can be weird. As a Foreign Service employee your compensation includes shipping your household effects and vehicle, most work related travel expenses incurred by you and your dependents, and, of course, diplomatic legal protection, but you spend much of your daily life surrounded by other Americans. In many ways this familiarity is comforting, but it takes extra effort to immerse yourself in the foreign country's culture.

Many Foreign Service families do fully experience living in another culture, but it requires one to venture beyond one's normal routine, and in our case, the barbed wired walls and armed guards protecting our housing community. By our third week here my body was adapting to the environment and time change and we were starting to feel settled, but every night before bed I felt a little anxious, and it wasn't because I had just moved to a foreign country. It was because I had moved to a foreign country but was spending most of my time within the walls of a place that looked a lot like South Florida.

As a post Manila is unique in that it would be easy to try to insulate oneself from the city's culture. You can't avoid the traffic, the pollution, or seeing evidence of extreme poverty as you drive to work, but you can eat at Chili's, shop for groceries at S&R (Costco), and watch Scrubs and Everybody Loves Raymond on local cable in your air-conditioned housing. You'd find yourself inconvenienced by not finding everything you want, but life would be familiar. In many ways, having access to American products is one of the benefits of this post, but it can also feel surreal.

Fortunately for me, the weekend after I began to feel agitated we went to Tagaytay, which, being without transportation, we wouldn't have been able to do without our wonderful friends. In Tagaytay I finally felt like I was living in a foreign country, and the bedtime anxiety disappeared. I find it interesting that in order to feel comfortable I had to pushed out of my comfort zone.

The Foreign Service community is one of the best things about life in the foreign service, but experiencing the exotic aspects of life abroad is equally important to enjoying this lifestyle. I look forward to exploring the Philippines further, and, in case I haven't mentioned it, the arrival of our car.

Going to see "the beautiful places"

2010-08-27T05:15:00.003-04:00

The best part about being posted in Manila is what's outside the city. Last weekend we had the opportunity to visit Tagaytay and Taal Volcano, and we saw some of the "beautiful places." (Every consular officer's favorite phrase.)

The view from People's Park

The view from Picnic Grove

Zip line at Picnic Grove

Tagaytay is built around the edges of Taal Volcano. In order to get to Crater Lake, you take a boat across Taal Lake to Volcano Island. I recommend driving down to the lake and buying your boat ride there. The road to the lake resembles the Mt. Washington Auto Road in New Hampshire and/or the road to Hana in Maui. Villagers greet you at the island and sell you a guide and a horseback trail ride up to the crater. The guide is likely necessary as an escort through the village, but we didn't go for the horseback ride. The horses are small ponies, and although the trail is hot, it only takes about an hour to hike up to Crater Lake. Haggling is acceptable. If you don't buy a horseback ride but get tired or overheated on the way up, no worries--the villagers follow you up the trail with a pony--just in case.

Boat ride across Taal Lake

The village on Volcano Island

Crater Lake at Taal Volcano

Reminders that we're standing on the inner rim of an active volcano

I highly recommend enjoying a delicious meal at Antonio's

We enjoyed fresh air, good food, and great company. I can't wait for our next trip!

Food, Whine, and the Foreign Service

2010-08-17T08:43:00.000-04:00

I have always been willing to try different types of food, but our move to the Philippines has challenged my flexibility. And not just balut or this local delicacy:

Having never traveled in a country where you can't rely on basic sanitation practices, much less drink the water, being afraid of my food is a new experience for me. Between our lack of transportation and the amoebas, these past two and a half weeks I have been much more interested in cooking.

However, after my first week of freaking out, my fear has not kept me from exploring the local cuisine. It has made me much more conscious of my food choices. My first time at every new restaurant I wonder, will this be the one that does it? But as long as it smells good I eat it anyway.

I'm glad I'm trying the food, because Manila has a lot to offer. We had a special occasion to celebrate during our time here, and we went to a French restaurant in Fort Bonifacio. I can't remember ever having sorbet in a tea kettle full of dry ice.

I had so much fun playing with it I almost forgot to eat it. And in case you were wondering if Starbucks has anything different in Asia:

Manila is a hardship post, but not for lack of fresh fruits and vegetables. The local large supermarkets haven't impressed me with their produce, but then again, neither did the grocery stores back home. However, the local farmers' markets are excellent.


Lime-skinned Oranges

I have been enjoying planning our dinners around what looks good at the market on Sundays.

And if we don't want to cook, we can order in. You can have almost anything delivered in Manila. Tonight we had Indian food delivered to our door. It wasn't quite as delicious as Haandi in Falls Church, but it was good!

Practicing good food safety habits is prudent, but hiding in fear of amoebas is not necessary. I could eat all of my meals at home and still find myself sick. Fortunately we have a good med unit, and I just learned how to make homemade yogurt.

Finding Home Again

2010-08-13T03:03:00.001-04:00

Within 48 hours of landing in Manila everyone, including the dogs, was sick--our house was full of coughing dogs and sniffling, feverish, and generally unhappy humans. In addition, I was scared to eat. This being our first post and my first time in a developing country, I did not know what to do when told that I couldn't drink the water outside of our house, bleaching vegetables was recommended, and getting amoebic dysentery was a way of life. At the end of our first week I started experiencing stomach pains, which I was sure meant that I was going to die of an amoeba attack, but it turns out that I likely brought it on myself by taking too much Vitamin C on an empty stomach. A week ago I was questioning our decision to join the Foreign Service for the first time. Why would I want to live somewhere that made me sick?

However, over the weekend I started feeling better and had the opportunity to explore the city, and both my health and my outlook improved. Our sponsors took me to a wonderful plant market, where I bought seven healthy plants, including an orchid, for $14. I made sure to get several spider plants, which help clean the air. And our neighbors took me to the Legaspi Market, where I was overjoyed to find good quality organic produce. Finding houseplants and a good place to go grocery shopping are important steps in my nesting process.

This week has been completely different. I am enjoying my job, found a great yoga studio, and our newly hired part-time helper/aso ya ya is wonderful. We have trips out of the city planned, we've made new friends, and we've renewed friendships with old(er) friends. I have yet to die of an amoeba attack--always a plus.

Last week I knew better than to make judgments about Manila based on what I had been experiencing thus far. My initial emotional response to feeling sick, overwhelmed, and isolated was normal, and I was fairly sure that things would improve. We didn't expect to feel so confined by not having a vehicle, but there's very little we can walk to from our house, and the air quality does not make walking a pleasant experience--at least not if you're anywhere near a large street. Fortunately there is a dog park next to our building where Julie and Grace can run, and my new air filtering mask works very well. I am even no longer particularly bothered by the smell of frying palm oil, and in fact, recognize it as a sign that I should avoid that restaurant.

Settling in to our new home will have its ups and downs, and I know that cultivating flexibility and living in the present will help us adjust. It's hard to be worried about the future when you're busy absorbing what's going on right now. We still look forward to having our car, but after a couple of taxi rides and getting to know our new friends and neighbors, we no longer feel isolated, just inconvenienced.

All settled in

Organic produce!

2010-08-08T01:27:00.001-04:00

... beer can chicken, and a whole roasted pig. Just some of the food items you will find at the Legaspi Market in Manila.

I was so happy to find fresh, good quality fruits and vegetables. I still haven't bought any raw meat.

A big bag of organic produce for only $18! I bought some oranges with lime colored skin--they smell like oranges but I haven't tried one yet. I sampled some lychee but saved that for another day.

I had to buy a big woven basket (not one of these but similar) to carry my loot. The market also sells art, gifts, clothing, and used books. Read it Again could open a Philippine branch!

Lechon - a whole roasted baboy (pig). I don't eat pork, so I don't know if it's good.

Yum! Malagkit (slightly sweet sticky rice) with flavor or filling. I brought home a mango roll.

Fresh honey.

San Miguel beer can chicken!

I meant to buy yogurt, but ended up with milk. It's the best milk I've ever tasted, so I look forward to the yogurt.

First impressions

2010-08-06T22:44:00.001-04:00

In the weeks when you are preparing for your first overseas assignment, it’s hard to imagine what it will really be like when you finally arrive. You research what others say about the area, but you also keep yourself open so that you can come into the experience without prejudices.

It’s also important to keep an open mind during your first few weeks, when everything is different and you and your body are adjusting to being in a (non-western) foreign country. For example, I am refraining from making any assessments because I have been sick since our third day here. First a horrible cold, and now some kind of stomach thing. My impression of our med unit is very positive.

Our second day here was great. Our sponsors drove us around the area surrounding our apartment, and we were able to see the incredible contrast that is common in Manila. First we drove around the local community market, which was very much what one might expect to find in a developing country. Then we went to the Mall of Asia, which, with its indoor skating rink, can be compared to the Mall of America. It was a very familiar--and very western--experience. Even in the most expensive areas of town you see evidence of poverty when you see the people who live immediately outside the community's walls.

I eagerly await the arrival of our truck, internet access in our home, and to be healthy again. My first impression of Manila is that it would be easy to surround oneself with things that are familiar--malls, IMAX theater, American grocery store brands (including Florida’s Natural orange juice), but then what would be the point of living on the other side of the planet? It’s comforting to have these things available but ... I look forward to having opportunities to explore.

The dogs arrived healthy, happy, and energetic last Saturday morning. We were so relieved to see them, and I highly recommend KLM as a pet shipper. Grace’s ear continues to heal, and Julie is loving the grassy dog park at the foot of our building.

Healing nicely

Rollin', rollin', rollin' ...

2010-07-27T13:58:00.003-04:00

There is a point in a FS move to post-a.k.a. PCSing or permanent change of stationing-when the ball starts rolling, and you, your family, and your 18 suitcases start rolling along with it.

That doesn't mean that there aren't bumps. For example, due to the particulars of our move and pet shipping we had to leave our dogs in a boarding facility for the first time. This is a good facility, but accidents happen, and on Sunday morning poor Grace was attacked through the fence by the dog next door. Her big floppy dachshund ear was injured. Of course we wanted to rush back to DC and rescue her, but the ball is rolling, so we can't.

Now Grace is getting extra special treatment and a bed in the kitchen surrounded by humans, while Julie hangs out in their run by herself. Grace will arrive in Manila with stitches, but I'm sure she will heal. We will be very glad to have them back with us.

And once the pack out ball starts rolling, you can't stop it, even if the movers are five hours late and don't leave your apartment until 10 pm. It's always interesting to see what we misdirect. In FL I managed to include my wedding dress in our shipment to Manila, this time it was just a bike tire pump that was left out, which our friends were happy to inherit. Perhaps my dress can be altered for a marine ball, and I'm sure they sell tire pumps in Manila.

We're rolling on out of the US, and my next blog post will be from Manila! Today I'm writing from an iPad with 3G--hopefully we'll have internet access soon after we arrive. To our friends and family in the US, skype often and we'll be back on R & R before we know it. To our friends in Manila, thank you for all your help and see you soon!

7/29
P.S. Sorry for any misunderstanding, but Grace's ear is not damaged beyond repair--it just has an inch long gash, which is reported to be healing nicely. She's also enjoying all the special attention she's getting at the kennel!

Why I Blog

2010-07-15T18:33:00.002-04:00

As a ship’s voyage progressed, the course came to be marked down in a book that was called a log. ~ Andrew Sullivan, "Why I Blog," The Atlantic (November 2008)

I came across this article by Andrew Sullivan a couple of weeks ago, and it inspired me to think about why I blog. As Sullivan points out, a blog is different from other types of writing in that it is published in real time, without significant editorial review. It is a journal that the writer shares with the public. But if it is a personal journal, why share it?

I came to write my blog because my husband and I benefited from reading foreign service blogs during our application process. Deciding to join the service is an intimidating endeavor, and from these blogs we gathered valuable information about what it's like to actually be in the foreign service.

After I started writing, I learned that blogging about the experience was helping me process the whirlwind of change that goes along with this journey. But because it's available to the public, a blog is not a journal. As a therapist I recommended journaling to clients as a coping tool--a safe place to vent and process strong emotions. Journaling is effective as a therapeutic tool, but blogging serves a different purpose.

In "Why I Blog," Sullivan writes that ships' logs were "an indispensable source for recording what actually happened." I have found that writing a blog helps me live in the moment. Having a blog forces me to live consciously--to pay attention to what is happening. Otherwise I'd have nothing to write about.

So I thank the blog authors whose blogs helped me make the decision to join the foreign service, and I thank myself for having the courage to share a bit of my life with the public. I am also grateful to the foreign service blogging community--in writing about your experiences you lessen the burden for all of us, because even if we are frustrated with what is happening, it's nice to know that we're not alone.

Summer-sault Cycle

2010-07-13T23:06:00.002-04:00

In the foreign service community, the "summer cycle" means LOTS of change. Most foreign service assignments are for 2-3 years, and since families with children try to schedule their moves around the school year, summer is a popular time for packouts, long plane flights, job changes, and general chaos.

Our family is contributing to the summer chaos with our move to Manila at the end of this month. Since this is our first move overseas, my personal chaos has a lot to do with facing the unknown, yet I predict that these feelings will become familiar with every passing summer cycle.

My time here in DC--I'll call it A-100 even though it lasted five months--has been a gift. I have developed wonderful friendships with wonderful people, had the opportunity to explore a great city, and had time to rediscover strengths I had set aside for my social work career. Not having to work a full time job has given me time to think about what I really want to do--not just what I have to do. And even though I am looking forward to making new friends and exploring the Philippines, I am sorry to leave the home we have created in DC.

Yet I have to remind myself that the foreign service life wouldn't be the foreign service life if we were not on the move so much. The wonderful group of people I've met here wouldn't be themselves if they didn't all share the quality of wanting to travel the world. If the hardest part about the lifestyle is having to separate from people and places you love, the best part is sharing your life with interesting, adventurous people.

If I could explore the world but guarantee a class reunion every year or so I'd be happy. But I'll have to settle for believing that the world truly does become smaller once you start moving around in it, and that I will see these wonderful people again. And to the 151st A-100 class, please stay in touch!

Reflections on language training

2010-07-06T21:39:00.000-04:00

Learning a foreign language is a challenging endeavor. It requires hours of study, taxing our memory and patience as we adapt to an entirely new way of communicating. As adults, our minds are stubborn, having settled into deeply ingrained speech and thought patterns, leading to perhaps one of the greatest challenges of learning a foreign language: breaking free from these patterns.

The primary challenge of learning a foreign language is purely technical. We first attempt to understand the language’s basic grammar rules, memorize vocabulary, learn pronunciation, and in some cases, reorient oneself to an entirely different sentence structure. For example, when compared to English, Tagalog’s sentence structure feels inverted. However, in order to approach fluency, we must not think of Tagalog as being “backward,” but simply a different sequence of thought. Disparities such as these require us to understand that language may not translate linearly, and that our minds must be open to foreign thought patterns as well as foreign words.

A secondary, but far subtler, challenge we face in learning to communicate in a foreign language is that of culture. Language is not spoken or understood in a cultural vacuum, and failing to appreciate the cultural nuances embedded within a particular word or phrase may cause us to fail to understand the full import of the language.

Thus, in seeking to truly understand a foreign language and communicate with a native speaker in a particular language, we must be open to learning all aspects of the language--including those aspects informing the nuances of the spoken word, not just the word itself. For example, Tagalog has one word to describe both the state of being alone and feeling lonely. According to our Tagalog instructor, the reason for this is simple: being without the company of others is so rare in the Philippines that Filipinos assume you are lonely if you are not surrounded by people. However, in English, being alone does not necessarily mean that one is lonely. Our individualistic society places great value on independence, and thus has several words to describe with greater accuracy whether one is “alone” or “lonely.” It is only through openness to understanding cultural nuance that we can completely appreciate this dichotomy.

In truth, any experience with a culture other than our own requires us to examine ourselves and to reflect on our basic assumptions about language and communication. As a language student, these subconscious assumptions are brought to the surface, and although challenging, offer us the opportunity to cultivate flexibility and openness. When learning a foreign language, our ultimate goal is to be able to communicate, and although learning another language takes us out of our comfort zone, it opens the door to a world of new experiences.

Having finished Tagalog training, we are now preparing to leave for Manila. In February we left our comfort zone by uprooting ourselves from my hometown and our home for the last five years. This month we will be leaving the comfort of the wonderful friends we have made from our A-100 class. Yet I look forward to meeting the friends we will make in Manila and experiencing life in a foreign country for the first time as adults.

We're going where?!

The other side of Filipino food

2010-06-29T09:35:00.001-04:00

Trying new foods can be one of the most exciting--and astonishing--aspects of living in a foreign country. Last Thursday our Tagalog teachers exposed us to one of the more shocking Filipino delicacies, but since then I've had the opportunity to experience other Filipino foods. And thank gosh--I love to try new foods, but I draw the line at bird embryo.

On Friday our class went to the Fairfax Inn, where we had halo-halo for dessert. Our teacher describes halo-halo as a mix of just about everything with ice cream. The one below was made of tapioca ice cream, condensed milk, ice shavings, a type of custard, rice crisps, coconut, tapioca pearls, gummies (or "bubbles" in Southeast Asia), and beans.

I look forward to trying one of these in the Philippines, perhaps at Jollibee.

At a party this weekend I had the opportunity to try some chicken lumpia, which is a small fried spring roll. They were delicious.

And finally, shortly after we were assigned to Manila a friend of ours loaned us his Filipino cookbook, and twice I've made Chicken Adobo.

It was masarap (Tagalog for delicious), if I do say so myself.

I look forward to exploring Filipino cuisine, although I cannot imagine ever being ready for balut. However, I've heard that exotic aspects of foreign life quickly become normal, so I won't say never.

Fear Factor FSI: Balut

2010-06-24T16:47:00.004-04:00

At FSI, our language courses are not limited to teaching us how to communicate--they are cultural experiences. In today's Tagalog class we had the opportunity to experience a Southeast Asian delicacy: balut. Americans with weak stomachs should probably stop reading now, especially if you plan on eating an omelet for dinner. However, if you're curious, please continue.

In the Philippines, balut is a fertilized duck egg with a partially developed embryo inside. Balut is commonly eaten as bar food, and is reputed to go well with cervesa. The larger eggs in the picture above are duck eggs, which I graciously surrendered to my classmates. I had the pleasure of experiencing a chicken egg balut.

It looks innocent, doesn't it?

First you crack open the shell like a hard-boiled egg and drink the "broth." I do not recommend smelling it beforehand.

You're not supposed to eat the egg white--it's gross.

You eat the yolk with a fork, and shoot the chick (like a shot of liquor). It is not recommended that you look at the embryo, but I did anyway.

Whoa.

No, I didn't have the courage to taste any part of this delicacy. The above picture of a thoroughly enjoyed balut must be credited to one of my classmates.

To those Spanish classes who taste the wines of South America, THIS is a cultural experience. It's also a good way to lose weight, as I didn't eat any of my snacks this morning. I am very glad that I didn't pack my usual egg salad sandwich for lunch.

If you'd like to see a funny video of a Filipino giving instructions on how to eat balut, please click here. It's highly entertaining, but again, not for weak stomachs.

Pack it up, pack it in

2010-06-19T18:32:00.002-04:00

Let us begin. I came to travel, blessed me, it's a hassle.
I promise I won't crack up; sir, you'd better back up
Don't return my emails and the whole crew will act up.
Get up, stand up, come on throw your hands up
If you've got a notion, jump across the ocean.

As we approach our second Foreign Service move, I find myself repeating many of the same concerns I had when we left Florida. Although I will continue to be unsettled until we have our questions answered by arriving, it is comforting to recognize that these feelings are simply part of being in a cycle of change.

Housing
In February we moved from a 3/2 house with a backyard to a one-bedroom apartment. I had low expectations for our temporary corporate housing, and was pleasantly surprised to discover that the apartments were nicer than I imagined. However, after four months of sharing a small space with two dogs and way too much stuff, my feng shui is thoroughly off balance. In Manila we will have a two bedroom apartment, but I'm still worried. Instead of a few months we'll be living in this apartment for two years, and as every FS GSO knows, housing is a very personal matter.

Dogs
Before we arrived here we were concerned about Julie adapting to apartment life, but were pleased to discover that the people in the metro DC area value green spaces. The parks in Northern Virginia are beautiful, and the dogs are getting more outdoor exercise here than they did in Florida. We have been getting mixed reports about the availability of dog-friendly green space in Manila, not to mention references to aso being a delicacy in the provinces north of Manila. Fortunately the American compound is said to have green space where we can walk the dogs, and if you've ever met a Vizsla who hasn't had a long walk recently, you know why we're concerned.

Career Goals
I left my job behind in Florida, and once I gave myself permission to relax, have been enjoying my time off. Not working has given me mental space to reflect on my priorities, and has helped me understand what I want out of a career. Ironically, our joining the foreign service could end up being a boost for my career, as not being obligated to work at a full time job has allowed to consider options that would have been financially risky in Florida. However, when we get to Manila I will need to start acting on my ideas, which is much harder than just thinking about them.

Distance from Friends and Family
The south pacific is a bit farther from Florida than DC. However, I'm grateful for Skype and email, and at least a twelve hour time difference will be easy to calculate.

Although we worried about these changes before we left Florida, we settled into our DC life easily and comfortably, and I hope that our transition to Manila will also be similarly smooth. Of course, moving to a foreign country will require additional adaptations, but I have enough to think about right now without additions.

Suspecting her of wanting to disrupt her comfort, Grace gives Julie the stink eye.

Poetry inspired by House of Pain

And the next day .........

Grace's suspicion is validated!

Professional Development Fellowships for FS Spouses and Partners

2010-06-16T15:50:00.001-04:00

This is a repost from Diplolife, and important information for Foreign Service spouses and partners!

FLO's 2011 Professional Development Fellowships

As I mentioned earlier this year in the post Funding Opportunities for Trailing Partners and Spouses, information on FLO's Professional Development Fellowships for the 2010-2011 term is out. The following was taken from the cable announcing the Fellowship:

The Family Liaison Office's Professional Development Fellowship program is open to spouses and partners of civilian direct hire US Government employees under Chief of Mission Authority [posted overseas]. This program is designed to assist those spouses and partners who are not in a position to pursue their career paths overseas to maintain, enhance, and/or develop their professional skills.

Fellowships will be granted on a reimbursable basis for enrichment activities. The 2011 program will have a minimum grant amount of $1,000 and a maximum of $2,500. The 2011 Fellowship period will cover activities that commence on October 1, 2010 and conclude no later than August 15, 2011.

Selected applicants must fund a minimum of 25% of the cost of the proposed activities while the Fellowship stipend will cover the additional cost up to the $2,500 maximum. Activities can include, but are not limited to, continuing education and distance learning through an accredited university, professional development, participation in professional conferences, and dues for membership in professional organizations.

The proposal deadline for 2011 is July 16, 2010.

More information and the application can be found on FLO's website at:http://www.state.gov/m/dghr/flo/c25927.htm

Being American

2010-06-14T21:47:00.000-04:00

It is easy to just be a part of one's own culture. During childhood we develop assumptions that inform our thought processes throughout our lives, and when we are living in our native culture these assumptions are usually below our conscious awareness. However, when we have the opportunity to interact with a different culture these assumptions may be challenged, and as a result, we learn more about ourselves. Although we have not yet left the US, I am experiencing a preview of having my assumptions challenged in our Tagalog classes.

Sometimes the most apparent cultural differences pertain to gender roles. In the US, opinions about gender roles vary depending on who you ask, but as a group most Americans are proud of the advances we've made in gender equality. Thanks to the hard work of women's advocates, American women have more opportunities than our grandmothers and great-grandmothers. Although I'm not sure all American women would agree, our Tagalog teachers tell us that in the Philippines Western men are said to help out with housework. The US also has room to grow, especially in the areas of pay disparity. Yet advances in gender equality present in different ways according to the customs of the culture.

According to the 2007 Global Gender Gap Index, which compares countries according to health/survival rates, education, political empowerment, and economic opportunity, the Philippines is the sixth most gender equal country in the world. This report not only challenged my basic assumptions, it also helped me reflect on what it means to be an American woman. Opportunities such as these are what make life in the foreign service a constant learning experience. When you live in a foreign country you not only learn about that country, you also have the opportunity to learn about yourself.

When Dogs Fly

2010-06-04T15:53:00.002-04:00

Last weekend we went to Club Pet to arrange for Julie and Grace's passage to Asia. Below is a picture of Julie's crate, which Grace claimed for her own.

At 40 pounds, Julie is not a large dog, but she's all leg. She takes after her parents. I am eight inches taller than the average American woman--I've never met a desk or table I could befriend. I am fully prepared to hear the word matangkad (Tagalog for extremely tall) as I walk the streets of Manila, where the average Pilipina doesn't reach five feet. My husband is 6'3", but as a man he's just mataas (tall). We love our height, but we're dreading the 16 hour flight, and are glad that Julie will not suffer from lack of space.

Airline regulations state that a dog must be able to sit down without her head touching the top of the crate, and it's very important to properly measure your dog before you buy your crate. You can't go by the crate company's estimation of weight--Julie needs a crate sized for an 80 pound Labrador.

I hope there's not much turbulence during her flight--they don't install seat belts in there.

Although we will be spending extra money shipping our "tall dog," as people call her, our 12 pound shorty fits nicely into a cat crate (don't tell her that). Dachshunds were bred to feel comfortable in small places, so Grace will be ok. With the ability to stand up and turn around, they'll both have more room than we humans.

Most airlines place an embargo on shipping pets as baggage when the departure and/or arrival destinations are warmer than 84 degrees fahrenheit, and since both DC and Manila will certainly be warmer than 84 degrees in July, the dogs will take a special route to Manila. KLM and Lufthansa ship animals in cargo holds that have the same climate control standards as the human passenger section, which eliminates the pet's risk of exposure to extreme heat or cold. Julie and Grace will fly from the US to Amsterdam, where they stop for a six hour layover in KLM's airport "pet hotel." They'll be fed and walked, their crates will be cleaned, and they'll be checked out by a vet before boarding a nonstop flight to Manila.

Safely getting our dogs overseas has been the most worrisome aspect of our decision to join the Foreign Service, so I am glad to finally feel comfortable with their flight plan. We couldn't travel much farther than Southeast Asia and still be posted on Earth, so our first flight will likely be one of the hardest. After this, traveling to South America or Europe will feel like a jaunt.

Grace vetoed this option.

Naintindihan mo ba?

2010-05-30T09:59:00.001-04:00

(Do you understand me?)

Even if you travel to a foreign country that speaks your native language, you can still get yourself in trouble by not understanding the locals. For example, an American woman who hears a British person say that something is "pear-shaped" may take it the wrong way; in the UK, "pear-shaped" is slang for a situation that's gone wrong. Although many Filipinos speak English as well as Tagalog, one of the benefits of learning their native language is getting a small preview of Filipino culture.

Although Filipinos in Manila speak English, they are not Westerners. Despite having spent "400 years in the convent and 50 in Hollywood," Filipino culture--and their communication--is unique. Although Americans living in Manila have the luxury of being able to speak English with the locals, we need to have a general understanding of the cultural communication differences. The two that follow were especially interesting to me:

Although both American and Filipino parents teach their children that it's rude to point, in the US the level of rudeness depends on the context. In the Philippines, pointing at something is, if not always rude, usually weird. Filipinos point with their lips. The term "boondocks" originated in the early 20th century with disoriented American soldiers stationed in the Philippines who, hearing the locals use the word "bundock" (Tagalog for mountain) began using the term "boondocks" to refer to the middle of nowhere. My Tagalog teacher suggested that when the American soldiers asked the Filipinos for directions, the response would have been to point with their lips towards a mountain, hence the Americans' general confusion.

I suppose I need to train myself to point with my lips, and in the meantime, if it looks like I'm making a kissy face at you, don't take it the wrong way.

In addition to differences in nonverbal communication, it is important to remember that when you translate a word literally the subtlety of usage may be lost. In the US, we sometimes refer to our elected representatives as "my/your Congressperson." Although we are using a possessive pronoun, we do not think that the government official actually belongs to us. American political culture is both individualistic and collective--we are individualistic in our opinions, but collective in that we feel a sense of responsibility about our government's actions.

However, in our class we have learned that when some Filipinos hear Americans use a possessive to refer to a government official, they think it sounds strange. Remind me to refer to Governor Crist as ang (the) Gobernador.

Although I know that we are only getting a micro preview of certain aspects of Filipino culture, I still find it interesting. After all, one of the reasons we chose to enter the Foreign Service was to have the opportunity to learn and explore. If those of you who have lived or living in Manila have anything to add to the above, I'd love to hear from you.

Tagalog highlights: week one

2010-05-20T21:08:00.002-04:00

Highlights of our first week of Tagalog:

1) Getting up at 6:00 am every day and therefore feeling jet lagged.

2) Learning more Tagalog in five days than half a semester of high school and/or college Spanish.

3) Coming back from lunch and saying "oui, oui" instead of "oo" (yes, pronounced oh-oh).

4) Discovering that studying a language can be fun!

5) Learning all the different ways I could offend someone by slightly mispronouncing a Tagalog word.

6 a) Learning about Filipino culture through their language.

b) Deciding that our asos will never be visiting the provinces.

7 a) Playing 20+ questions in Filipino.

b) Discovering how many politicians and celebrities I know nothing about.

8) Teaching Julie to maupo ka and tayo na in < 5 minutes. (sit and let's go commands)

9) Speak like Yoda I learn.

10) Learning that we won't be considered a family until we have anak, and that Filipinos don't think asos count as anak.

Anak namin for now

Sigurado namin doon pa?

2010-05-13T22:13:00.002-04:00

That's Tagalog for, "Are we there yet?" Tomorrow we start our eight weeks of language training, which means that the final countdown to our departure date is getting closer. Two months doesn't seem like much time--especially since we have so much to do--and yet it seems like ages until we get to see our home for the next two years.

We are enjoying our time here in DC, but this is an awkward period in our transition. It can be difficult to stay engaged in the present when you know your time is limited. We know where we are going and when we get there, but we have to WAIT to find out everything else. Yet perhaps this is time to practice the essential Foreign Service philosophy: enjoy the journey.

Of course, enjoying the journey does not mean that you don't have a destination. Staying in the present does not mean you can't have goals, a concept that Western students of Buddhism often find difficult. Having concrete goals that are separate from a physical location is an alien concept, and yet I know that, at this time in my life, I don't want to be cemented to a specific place.

My time of rest in DC has certainly offered me clarity and understanding. I know what I don't want. Until further notice, my mission statement is:

DON'T GET STRESSED OUT.

Followed closely by attending a yoga teacher training course in Southeast Asia.

So I do have goals that aren't attached to a physical locale: 1) learn to be patient 2) avoid getting stressed and 3) enjoy the ride.

In two months I may still be asking if we're there yet, but hopefully I will ask it in Tagalog without the help of Google translator. In the meantime, I should take time to appreciate what I will miss while in the Philippines, such as temperatures lower than 80 degrees.

Always ready to go

Mobile Home

2010-05-08T09:44:00.000-04:00

The importance of bringing familiar household items with you to help make you feel "at home" in your embassy housing is well known in the Foreign Service community. Although difficult to consider when you're packing out and want to get rid of everything, the difference between living in a hotel and a home may be what you do to make the space your own. However, when you move every couple of years, truly feeling at home in each new place may require cognitive as well as physical adjustments.

Sometimes our home is simply the place where we reside. While on vacation, I find myself saying that I'm ready to "go home" when I'm ready to go back to the hotel room. Sometimes we feel that we are at home when we find a place that fits well with our interests and values, even if we don't live there. Some people identify so strongly with their hometowns that they never feel at home anywhere else, and some will always consider the place where they grew up home, even if they establish another home elsewhere. In all of these definitions, home is a place where we can go to rest and regroup before heading out into the world again. However, those who feel most at home in a mobile lifestyle may prove that home doesn't necessarily have to be a place.

Feeling at home is connected to one's emotional state, attitude, and social network and thus, may not necessarily depend on a physical location. When you live in the same place for a long time you attach feelings of belonging to that specific place, but it may be possible to attach those same feelings to a community--even a worldwide community. If our homes are places of refuge, familiarity, and belonging, then perhaps home can be a group of people who share a common experience or lifestyle.When I think about why I consider Florida home I realize that if the people I care about didn't live there, the physical place would likely cease to be home.

Some new Foreign Service families come from a long history of frequent moves, but those of us who are used to being at home in a specific place will need to broaden our understanding of what makes a place home. For myself, one of my homes will be in Florida, but I hope I will continue to feel that I belong in the Foreign Service community.

Foreign Service Limbo II: Cultivating Yin

2010-05-03T17:22:00.000-04:00

There are different understandings of yin, especially in western culture, but most Americans associate it with the yin-yang symbol from Chinese philosophy.

In my yoga practice, I associate yin with a deeper, slower practice, as opposed to the more active practice of vinyasa, sometimes known as flow or power yoga. This afternoon in a yin yoga class, I realized that the balance of yin and yang in yoga may serve as a useful guide when navigating the Foreign Service limbo.

As I wrote last week, when something is difficult we are tempted to rush through it, and sometimes hurt ourselves in the process. In yin yoga, you hold the poses longer than you would in a flow class, and although it seems like baddha konasana (butterfly) would not be particularly difficult for an experienced yogi, holding the asana for a full five minutes can be challenging.

As I persisted in my five minute baddha konasana, it reminded me of my experience as a foreign service spouse. At first, getting into a great stretch feels wonderful and liberating, but if you hold it long enough it may start to feel uncomfortable and perhaps even restrictive. However, if you patiently work through the period of discomfort, you find calm and balance waiting for you on the other side.

When you are preparing to move and/or adjusting to a new place, you may feel displaced and uncomfortable once the novelty wears off, and it's tempting to want to ease the discomfort by trying to change your situation. However, in the Foreign Service you may not have the ability to do so and thus, it may be better to hold steady. Once again I refer to the wonderful chart from Diplolife.

If you act when it starts to get uncomfortable, you risk that you will never experience the enjoyment of appreciating what your current circumstances have to offer. The exception being when the circumstances are clearly a bad fit, or rather, if you can't bend back, stay away from back bends.

Yoga and the foreign service both teach the importance of staying present--of being fully aware of what's going on in the moment, and not getting caught up by the past or tangled in expectations for the future. We are scheduled to leave for post in July, and although I am finding this period of waiting somewhat awkward, I intend to continue appreciating what it has to offer. Hopefully next year, when we are once again bidding on posts, I will have learned things that will help me balance the yin and yang of life in the foreign service.

Foreign Service Relocation Limbo: how loose can you hang?

2010-04-28T10:57:00.000-04:00

According to Wikipedia, the limbo, a dance that originated in Trinidad, "reflects the whole cycle of life." A dancer's ability to clear the pole as it is gradually lowered symbolizes "the triumph of life over death." Although successfully relocating in the Foreign Service is certainly not a triumph over death, it can be difficult, and a successful transition requires many of the same abilities as the limbo.

Flexibility is a core requirement for both a mobile life and a limbo dancer. If your body isn't built for back bends, don't bend it back--unless you love seeing your orthopedist. Similarly, if you dislike change, don't choose a life in the foreign service. However, flexibility alone may not be sufficient for either.

Flexibility is high-maintenance. You must warm up, honor your limits, and know that every day brings a new adventure. If you rush, you're more likely to be injured, yet it's natural to want to speed through something that makes us uncomfortable. Navigating change requires patience.

Foreign Service Officers and their families spend a lot of time dealing with the indeterminate future. First you wonder where you'll be assigned, then you wonder when you'll get your orders, then you wait for all the details from all the different departments to come together: housing, travel orders, training schedules, etc. Between the date of your assignment and your arrival you need a lot of answers from a few very busy people, and the necessity of being patient can conflict with our desire to be autonomous.

Knowing when to push forward, and when to hold steady, is the key to the limbo that is life in the foreign service. Self-advocacy is essential, but unusual anxiety about not knowing can be harmful. Every two years you dance another relocation limbo, but once you're clear, the rewards can be extraordinary.

If you can't beat 'em, Tandem?

2010-04-19T23:15:00.001-04:00

Always a hot topic in the foreign service community, spousal employment continues to be a significant concern for Foreign Service Officers and their families. Diplopundit and Ryan and Lori recently posted about an article in the Summer 2009 issue of FLO Direct News, which states that "nearly two-thirds [of adult family members] expressed an interest in working, while only a third was successful in finding employment." In addition, "many positions filled by family members inside the Mission tend to be clerical in nature and therefore widely viewed by the approximately 75% of family members with degrees (of whom about half have advanced degrees) as not very challenging or interesting." In their blog, Ryan and Lori wonder how often a FSO chooses to leave the Foreign Service because his or her spouse cannot maintain a professional career. I have an additional question: how difficult is it to be a tandem couple in the Foreign Service?

A tandem couple is a term used to describe two Foreign Service employees who are married to each other. Because my husband is the son of a retired GSO, we were familiar with the concept before my husband decided to pursue a careeer in the Foreign Service. However, when my husband started his application process I decided against applying for several reasons: 1) I was busy working 2) I was concerned about the complications of bidding on posts as a tandem, and 3) I was unwilling to entertain the possibility of being separated. As detailed in this article written by an Officer married to a Specialist, the possibility of being separated is very real. However, being a tandem couple may not be as difficult as it seems.

In our short time as members of the Foreign Service community we have met several tandem couples, an experience that is most certainly related to our assignment to the Philippines. Embassy Manila is quite large and thus, very accommodating for tandem couples looking for two job openings in the same location. Although it may be unavoidable that small posts may not commonly have two job openings at the same time, there are plenty of large posts in the world, and separation may not be absolute.

In addition, the post assignment process is complicated, but not arbitrary. Although the Needs of the Service are paramount, the State Department makes a significant effort to accommodate its Officers' preferences. Officers are not always assigned to their high and medium rated posts, but the Service does not ignore the wishes of its diplomats and their families. In fact, it makes every effort to keep tandem couples together, and encourages qualified spouses to apply. After all, the Needs of the Service are better met by a two for one deal.

It's been a little over two months since I left my job behind in Florida, and although I am enjoying Project Relax, I've been on vacation long enough to know that I will eventually want to return to professional life. Being well aware of the limitations of maintaining a professional (paid) career as the spouse of an FSO, my thoughts turn to the possibility of being an FSO myself, especially since the responsibilities of a consular officer fit well with social work skills. However, I would like to have more information about the reality of being a tandem couple before settling on it as a goal.

The Simplicity of Mobility

2010-04-06T10:08:00.000-04:00

No one joins the Foreign Service expecting to simplify his or her life. No one thinks, "My life is so complicated. I think I'll become a traveling diplomat (or a diplomat's spouse/partner)." When compared to the comfort and stability of a stationary life, how could a life of incessant travel be simple? Yet constant mobility encourages--and often enforces--simple living.

Possessions: When you live in one place for an extended period of time, you start to collect things. I am not particularly prone to packrat behavior, but neither am I a master of de-cluttering. I just might need that ____ someday. However, because the Foreign Service will only ship 7, 650 lbs of a family's belongings, one learns to choose what to keep very carefully. In addition, with the exception of a 400 lb air shipment, these belongings have to travel across oceans to reach you, and thus, FS families must learn to do without most of their things for anywhere from a few weeks to a few months. And when you realize that you can live without that ____, having it suddenly becomes a burden.

Ambition: On the surface, it appears to be extremely difficult to have a continuous career as a foreign service spouse. And if you stay attached to your stateside career expectations, it is difficult. A spouse's traditional career trajectory is often abruptly interrupted when he or she relocates to DC or overseas, but this change does not need to derail his or her career. In my experience, the more comfortable I become with my career change, the more I realize the opportunities embedded in the lifestyle. If I define a career as doing something I enjoy and feel is meaningful, regardless of pay, my career paths are limitless.

Opportunities for Learning: I have always been a curious person, and am motivated to seek new experiences. As a social worker with a full time job, it took a lot of planning and energy to obtain education outside of my workplace, not to mention trying to fit exotic travel into my weekends and vacation days. Life in the Foreign Service provides the stability of having a home and an income and the adventure of traveling, and thus, I feel freedom in knowing that, every two years, my home will be the new experience.

Responsibilities: Speaking of collecting things, one set of items that have been steadily increasing for the last five years are our bills. Stationary life combined with a steady dual income encourages spending, and since we've joined the foreign service we've been shedding expenses. Thank heaven we never bought a second home. Unlike relocating as a private citizen, State pays for a large portion of its officers' moving expenses, hires movers to pack you out, and assigns housing at every new post. You may not always like the choices made for you, but there is a wonderful simplicity in not having a choice.

This is not to say that life in the Foreign Service is easy--it has plenty of challenges. However, it has been a pleasant surprise to realize that what seems like a complicated lifestyle has actually simplified my life in many ways.

It's a foreign service dog's life.

Attitude and the Collective Consciousness

2010-03-31T12:45:00.004-04:00

Life in the foreign service takes you out of your comfort zone, and although your comfort zone expands as you adjust, there may be certain aspects of living abroad that always make you anxious. Everyone interacts with a place differently, and as we travel one of the most important things we have the opportunity to explore is ourselves.

Anxiety about not having control comes with worldwide availability, and it is not uncommon to feel the need to distance ourselves from posts that scare us. However, by being aware of our feelings, we may be able to avoid harming our fellow foreign service members by imposing our negative feelings on our teammates.

Everyone has a different opinion about what makes a post "good." Some people love small hardship posts for their tight knit embassy communities. Some are happiest in large, cosmopolitan cities. Some people love danger posts in developing countries for the opportunity to be a part of an important American mission at the ground level. Some base everything on whether or not they can take their Vizsla for a walk. Regardless of our personal preferences, communicating negative opinions about another person's post assignment is never helpful.

It is perfectly ok to have feelings about a post, and absolutely necessary to express these feelings in an appropriate manner to the appropriate people. However, because our experiences are influenced by our expectations, we must be sensitive about expressing negativity to our fellow teammates in the diplomatic community. Facts are helpful; negative emotion is not. This includes feelings about a post's safety, especially if that post has recently made the news.

When you are going to a hardship or danger differential post--or both--it helps to know that you have the support of your community behind you. That your service is appreciated as a contribution to a larger global purpose; not as something happening to you, but as something you are doing with the support of others.

We have all, at some point, responded poorly when hearing of someone else's post assignment. What is important is whether or not we were aware that we responded poorly. As a whole the foreign service is remarkably supportive and collegial, and it is this characteristic that makes it a joy to be part of this community. However, mindful sensitivity is an ongoing practice, and we must remember that even when we are separated by oceans, we are all in this together.

Julie overcomes her fear of the unknown

Blue Sky Thinking

2010-03-26T18:09:00.001-04:00

In American culture, a person's identity is linked to his or her job. We make assumptions, sometimes incorrectly, about an individual based on his or her profession. When a person is occupied in a way that makes it difficult to label him or her as a teacher, doctor, lawyer, homemaker, etc., the average American may find him or herself at a loss as how to define this person. We want want to know what you do.

Indeed, having something to do is important to our sense of self, and having fulfilling work contributes to our happiness, but the nature of the foreign service lifestyle requires an FSO's family members to be extraordinarily flexible regarding career opportunities, school choices, and many other aspects of daily life. For some FS family members, it is difficult to see past these losses to appreciate the rewards.

When our family decided to pursue a life in the foreign service, we agreed that I would not be expected to have a paid job. Although many foreign service families do not feel that one income will support their needs--perhaps especially those with kids heading to college--foreign service family members are not guaranteed a job at post. Thus, family member employment is an important element of the Family Liaison Office's advocacy and resource development. However, even though I do not feel compelled to have a paid job, I do seek "active indispensable employment."

Regardless of whether or not I am paid, I will always be able to define myself as a social worker as long as my work contributes to social justice and social change. However, before we left Florida, I wasn't sure that volunteer work could sustain my career. And I was concerned that not being paid could make me feel that I was less of a contributing family member.

I am no longer worried. As I research the opportunities to practice social work in Manila, I find myself drawn to volunteer and per diem work rather than full time paid jobs. Although that may change, I also realize that if I have a full time job as an embassy office worker, I will have less time to explore the city and learn about Filipino culture. However I employ myself, looking for work as a foreign service spouse is difficult, but offers the opportunity to expand one's definition of a meaningful occupation.

Beyond Boundaries

2010-03-19T10:31:00.000-04:00

When people are thrown together into an unknown situation, it is not uncommon for strong friendships to form quickly. Everyone is new, most are excited, and more than a few are a little anxious. The shared experience forms common ground, and your fellows in the process may come to feel like family.

In the Foreign Service generalist orientation, it only takes about four weeks for these bonds to form. Between the long days of class, the formal and informal social events, and a high percentage of the class living in one of the three Oakwood housing complexes, most FS officers and their families feel quite comfortable with each other by the time Flag Day rolls around. Thus, it can be startling to realize that the people who have shared this experience with you will soon be scattered around the world.

Although it may seem odd that some of us are leaving in April while others are here until February of next year, the friendships formed in A-100--and at our future two or three year posts--will endure beyond the boundaries of fourteen hour flights. And we have friends to visit in every part of the world. We have already invited ourselves to Mexico, Africa, China, and a few more.

Today we go to the swearing in ceremony at main State--"graduation" from A-100--and next week the newly appointed FSOs and some of their family members will start language and/or job specific training. For some, this may be the point at which the journey begins to feel real. For others, it's just another chapter. I'm just hoping that everyone has a guest room.

The 151st A-100 plans its leave time

The Unexpected Explorer

2010-03-16T11:28:00.004-04:00

Flexibility and non-attachment: essential elements of foreign service life. Most foreign service families are aware of this, and have varying degrees of success in managing their expectations. For some FS newcomers, Flag Day, the ceremony in which an A-100 class' post assignments are announced, is the first time it's clear that we truly have No Choice.

As we approached our flag day I felt flexible and unattached. I was aware that I preferred a post in the western hemisphere, but with over thirty open posts in Latin America, it seemed likely we would be assigned to one of them.

Flag day reminded me that life in the foreign service necessitates worldwide availability. They aren't kidding. It is unwise to become attached to any country, continent, region, hemisphere, language, or culture because you have chosen to serve your country, and will be assigned according to the needs of the service.

Manila is a terrific first post. The Filipinos are warm, friendly, and welcoming of Americans. It's a good post for dogs, and the travel opportunities are incredible. It is perhaps one of the best posts for my career, as I will have ample opportunities for paid or unpaid work in my field.

Being posted here also offers hidden gifts. Because we were not oriented towards this region of the world, we were not fully aware of its travel opportunities. Manila is a short flight away from Southeast Asia, a region that we otherwise may have never seen due to China's restrictions on dog importation.

People have said that the Career Development Office seems to knows us better than we know ourselves, and when I compare our core preferences to Manila I realize that this post is a good fit for our family. I also believe that when you don't get exactly what you think you want, you have two choices. You can resent that you didn't get to choose, or you can choose to appreciate the gifts embedded in what's been chosen for you. There are strengths and challenges in every city, country, and culture, and the foreign service will take you out of your comfort zone. However, unexpected opportunities for exploration are wonderful.

Manila doesn't know what's coming

My feet feel just fine

2010-03-09T12:33:00.001-05:00

World travelers are sometimes said to have "itchy feet." Those who use this axiom intend it to describe a person who can't stay in the same place long because he or she is compelled to be on the move. Although this may be true for many travelers, it is not an accurate description of all of us.

I am an explorer who is compelled to nest. I love to learn, and my travel is motivated by my desire to experience new things and learn about different cultures. However, I must have a safe place to come home.

My initial nesting tends to be centered on food--I don't feel comfortable in a new place until I know how to get to the grocery store and have found at least one decent restaurant. For many foreign service families, home is not defined by one's surroundings, but whether or not your family members are there with you. Although I intermittently feel sad about leaving my home in Florida, the only time I've felt acutely homesick was the night my husband was away on his A-100 class retreat.

My feet feel just fine, and although I don't feel compelled to be on the move, my curiosity is much stronger than my unwillingness to have to re-nest every couple of weeks, months, or years. On Friday we learn where we will be posted for two years. There are many places I will be comfortably excited about going, a few that will make me go "eek" but I will look forward to exploring, and a few that, despite my efforts at not forming expectations, I will be emotionally unprepared for if Brian is handed one of their flags. Nevertheless, I know that once I find the local grocery store, all will be well.

DC has plenty of good restaurants

Project Relax

2010-03-05T12:57:00.000-05:00

Foreign service spouses, like their officer partners, tend to be flexible, open-minded, and adaptable. Although foreign service families originate from a wide variety of backgrounds and experiences, these basic qualities may be a prerequisite for even considering a mobile lifestyle, much less making the decision to uproot yourself and your family and dive in headfirst.

However, flexibility does not equal indifference, and being willing to adapt does not mean one is aimless. Spouses who accompany their partners overseas do not do so because they don't have personal goals and ambitions, and thus, face the unique challenge of finding a way to grow and develop within the parameters of constant mobility and/or waiting to be moved.

The Foreign Service is aware of this, and does its best to help its officers' partners thrive as foreign service spouses. In addition to its training classes, the family liaison office network points us in the direction of valuable telecommuting resources such as the Rat Race Rebellion. However, by funneling us towards activity, these solution-focused resources don't address the first thing a new foreign service spouse needs to do: relax.

For those of us who have left or are anticipating leaving active careers, being in the pre-overseas departure limbo can be disconcerting. Up to this point our professional lives have been focused on upward mobility, and our first instinct in reacting to this change is to continue moving. However, the nature of the foreign service requires its officers' partners to be willing to stand still for weeks, and sometimes even months, which can be counter intuitive to a goal-oriented individual. Thus, my first goal is to embrace being on an extended vacation--to take a sacred pause--and the rest will come as it may.

From Garfield minus Garfield

Project Relax has total buy-in from Julie and Grace

Identity Disorientation Disorder

2010-03-01T11:29:00.000-05:00

The Foreign Service is aware that its partnered officers come as a package. To meet the needs of its EFMs (Eligible Family Members), State offers training courses, employs family liaisons, and strongly encourages spouses to attend post assignment meetings. Nevertheless, as with any private company, the State Department cannot consider its FS spouses equal to its employees. It's just not realistic.

For new foreign service families, this can lead to role confusion, especially for the officer's spouse. Many spouses leave careers in order to embark on this adventure with their partners, and almost everyone leaves their safety zone for the wide world of the unknown. Although I doubt that any spouse envies his or her partner's 40+ hours a week of training, finding where we, as spouses, fit in to this system can be challenging.

In many ways, FS spouses have it good, especially those who aren't keeping their full time jobs during the initial training. We live in a world of possibility. At the moment I am considering multiple new career paths: online counselor, yoga teacher, artist, dog walker, community organizer, and a few more. One might say that I am experiencing an identity moratorium, except that I would love to make a commitment, but I can't. At this point, I can't predict what opportunities will be available at and/or accommodated by our new post, or which careers can withstand constant mobility. As with everything else about the foreign service lifestyle, it depends.

Identity is rooted in "personal sameness" (Erik Erikson, 1970), and thus, the challenge of every new foreign service family is learning how to create a sense of sameness despite nothing ever being the same. To truly accept a life of routine change, one must embrace the opportunities embedded within it. Two weeks into this life, I have no idea what I'm doing. However, with patience--and perhaps a post assignment--I trust that I will discover where and how I fit in.

Freedom of no choice

2010-02-23T10:27:00.000-05:00

Julie considers our possibilities

I always have, and always will, support self-determination as a basic human right. Having said that, the process of bidding on worldwide duty stations has shown me that not having a choice can sometimes be liberating.

For months prior to getting a job offer from the Foreign Service, Brian and I were hypothesizing, researching, and dreaming about what country we might live in should we have the opportunity to work abroad. We perused Real Post Reports, a non for profit website that keeps a database of personal insights from North Americans who have or are currently living abroad, and communicated with current and hopeful Foreign Service Officers on Livelines. Having no idea what might actually BE on our bid list, we tried to predict which posts commonly had vacancies, and India got a lot of our attention.

We received the bid list last week, and there was one Indian post on a list of over 100 vacancies.

But we're not disappointed. In fact, we're giving over thirty posts a high rating on our priority list, which we will submit to our Foreign Service Career Development Officer on Friday. Of the 100 + posts, we must rate each of them as high, medium, and low according to our personal and professional preferences. However, we don't get to decide where we're going.

Although it is true that my attitude might be different if our bid list hadn't fit so well with our personal desires, I am still struck by how liberating it has been to realize that ultimately, I don't get to choose. It's not MY responsibility to make sure that I make the best possible choice, because it's not my choice. I certainly hope that our preferences--especially our preferences related to our dogs--will be honored, but if they are not I intend to adjust my expectations in order to appreciate the strengths and adapt to the challenges of whichever country we're assigned. Our choice is not in the post assignment, but in how we choose to react.

Grace requests somewhere warm

Routine change

2010-02-17T09:29:00.000-05:00

When you commit to a mobile life, you are also committing yourself to flexibility. For the past five years my routine has been the same, and although I am comforted by routines, I have chosen to join the foreign service because I am looking for new experiences. Every two years we will move to a new house; every two years we will have to acclimate to a new neighborhood and an entirely different culture. And every two years we will gain knowledge we would have remained ignorant of had we lived out our lives in Florida.

For someone who likes routines, change, even change you seek, can be disconcerting. However, in the last few days I find myself settling into a new routine. It's true that many of the small things have changed--and this time we've only moved to another state--but the important things stay constant, and there are bonuses.

The things I miss the most so far are: my backyard, commercial free TV through the DVR, snow free landscaping, my family, and my kitchen.

Things I've gained: weekly maid service, romping in the snow with Julie, time, Trader Joe's, Brian's family (they're local), and new friends.

Tomorrow we receive the bid list--a list of job openings in cities around the world, and we have a week to prioritize our preferences and return the list to our Foreign Service career development officer. Tomorrow we'll know where we might be living for two years, and we'll receive our post assignment on March 12th. However, I can be sure that wherever we go, our lives will be filled with routine change.

The view from our window

To view a video of Julie and Grace playing in the snow at a local dog park, please click here.

Our family's big break

2010-02-12T17:14:00.004-05:00

As we we prepare to leave my home state and the place we've lived and worked for the past five years, I find myself wondering if it's easier or harder for new foreign service families who already live in Washington, DC.

For DC area residents, starting A-100 may be like changing jobs. There are big changes coming, but for now your routine more or less stays the same. Your spouse can keep his or her job, your kids stay in school, and your house remains intact. On the other hand, when you leave for your post you must cope with leaving your home at the same time as you are adapting to life overseas.

For those of us who relocate for the initial training, DC is a staging ground. The past few weeks have been quite stressful, and we're counting on having packed everything we may or may not need in the next twelve months into the air and car shipments, but our final pack out should be fairly simple. And since the average training time is four to six months--and can last up to a year if you need language training--we'll have the opportunity to begin adjusting to leaving our home while we can still make free long distance calls on our cell phones and trust that we can find our favorite toothpaste at the local Walgreens.

Either way, joining the foreign service requires you to adapt to significant changes to your routine, your expectations, and your comfort level. We're taking it one step at a time. Tomorrow we head north, and in four to twelve months we'll head overseas. For now I'll just concern myself with the bizarre DC weather and driving my native Floridian self through the snow and ice.

Saying goodbye to the Florida beaches

At least I can't relate to Office Space

2010-02-05T18:45:00.001-05:00

My career was one of the major concerns my husband and I had to work through when we were considering a life in the foreign service. As a clinical social worker my strengths are somewhat portable, but there are still significant challenges. In my last days at work the question, "What are you going to do" came up frequently, and my optimistic answer was: "I can do social work anywhere there are people, as long I speak their language."

Of course, that doesn't address the following concerns: safety, cultural barriers, gender discrimination, transportation, eligibility for a work visa, financial concerns, etc, etc, etc.

I'm jealous of web-based graphic designers.

Fortunately, there is a wealth of resources available for spouses of foreign service officers, most of which can be found at the A Portable Identity website. A Portable Identity was written by two clinical social workers who are married to men whose careers required frequent international relocation.

At the moment I should be concentrating on tomorrow's pack out, so my long term career goals are going to have to wait. I must trust that I will be able to find or create opportunities for meaningful work wherever we are, and at least I know I'll have support.

Baggage allowance

2010-02-03T21:41:00.001-05:00

After many weeks of frenzied sorting, carting, and donating, I find myself reflecting: which comes first--the stress or the stuff?

Preparing for a mobile life requires brutal decision making. Do I really need all these shoes? (Yes!) But do I really want to ship them overseas? ... No. After sorting through our belongings for the four-part government shipment (permanent, long term, air, and car), I find myself feeling less stressed.

It's a bit like leaving home for college. You must learn to be flexible about your surroundings, share a bathroom (in this case with my husband in our temporary furnished housing), and shed your old expectations to make room for new experiences. And, like going to college, it's challenging, but also refreshing.

Yesterday was my last day at work, and although my hospice care agency was wonderful and my work meaningful, while cleaning out my office I found five years worth of various stress relief products.

So, what comes first, the stress or the stuff? Not that choosing a life in the foreign service is stress-free (far from it), but thus far it's a different kind of stress--the stress of dealing with change. Perhaps later I'll miss those shoes, and I know I will miss my co-workers, but for the moment, I am enjoying the feeling of shedding some unnecessary weight. After all, the FS only allows us to bring 8,000 pounds of baggage.

This emotional diplomatic life

2010-01-31T14:20:00.000-05:00

This chart came from DiploLife, a wonderful blog written by another foreign service spouse (which may be primarily responsible for our interest in India). Being a therapist, I find this intellectually intriguing. Being someone who is currently experiencing the pre-departure ups and downs, I'm glad to see that this emotional roller coaster eventually levels out, and am looking forward to the honeymoon.

I'm aslo looking forward to living in Falls Church with the other new foreign service families. The diplomatic community appears to be very supportive, and most people who are interested in this life seem to share the characteristics of friendliness and flexibility. It's encouraging to know that we're all in this together.

Preparing for life in the foreign service

2010-01-29T23:30:00.000-05:00

I keep telling people at work that we're not risk takers--because we're not. I live a block away from the hospital in which I was born. But we're lucky. Perhaps we create our own luck, or maybe we can just recognize an opportunity when we see it. Either way, our family: myself, my husband, Grace the growly dachshund, and Julie the butterfly chasing vizsla are heading to Washington, D.C. to train for a life in the foreign service.

The last few weeks have been a frenzy of packing, farewell parties, transferring our responsibilities at work, and trying to give our stuff away. Brian starts A-100 training on February 16, and we leave Florida on February 13. I'm still looking for a taker on the popcorn maker I inherited from my in-laws. I swear it works.